Alternate
True Sayings
- Birds
of a feather flock together so they can crap on your
car.
- There's
always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to
look for it. For example, I am sitting here thinking
how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.
- When
I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the
neighbor's dog that barks all the time run to the
end of his chain and gag himself.
- If
you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be
vague.
- A
penny saved is a government oversight.
- The
older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because
by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
- The
easiest way to find something lost around the house
is to buy a replacement.
- He
who hesitates is probably right.
- If
you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone
in mind to blame.
- The
sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can
tell when he's really in trouble.
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