Legal
Laughs

The
following questions from lawyers were taken from official
court records nationwide...
1.
Was that the same nose you broke as a child?
2.
Now, doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in
his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away
and doesn't know anything about it until the next morning?
3.
Q: What happened then? A: He told me, he says, "I
have to kill you because you can identify me."
Q: Did he kill you?
4.
Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war?
5.
The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
6.
Were you alone or by yourself?
7.
How long have you been a French Canadian?
8.
Do you have any children or anything of that kind?
9.
Q: I show you exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize
that picture. A: That's me. Q: Were you present when
that picture was taken?
10.
Were you present in court this morning when you were
sworn in?
11.
Q: Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death. Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
12.
Q: Do you know how far pregnant you are now? A: I'll
be three months on November 8. Q: Apparently, then,
the date of conception was August 8? A: Yes. Q: What
were you doing at that time?
13.
Q: Mrs. Jones, do you believe you are emotionally stable?
A: I used to be. Q: How many times have you committed
suicide?
14.
So you were gone until you returned?
15.
Q: She had three children, right? A: Yes. Q: How many
were boys? A: None. Q: Were there girls?
16.
You don't know what it was, and you didn't know what
it looked like, but can you describe it?
17.
Q: You say that the stairs went down to the basement?
A: Yes. Q: And these stairs, did they go up also?
18.
Q: Have you lived in this town all your life? A: Not
yet.
19.
A Texas attorney, realizing he was on the verge of unleashing
a stupid question, interrupted himself and said, "Your
Honor, I'd like to strike the next question."
20.
Q: Do you recall approximately the time that you examined
the body of Mr. Edington at the Rose Chapel? A: It was
in the evening. The autopsy started about 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Edington was dead at the time, is that correct?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was
doing an autopsy!